okelay

Doctor Who
Doctor/Rose
post-doomsday
angst.
(yes, another one,sorry. i can't help it!)


"I loved you more than you'll ever know, a part of me died when i let you go"

"she was especial" the Doctor said.
"i told you, i've had many companions over the years, too many to count.and i was close with them all. i loved them all.
but i was, i am, in love with Rose. i don't know how it happened. it just did, and when i realized it, it was too late"
he looked down, his eyes were filling with tears and he didn't want martha to see him cry.

"Oh, Doctor" she said "I understand. she humanized you. it was bound to happen sooner or later. " she put her hand on his shoulder, trying to offer some comfort. she would have liked to hug him but she knew he wasn't too keen on physical contact. now she knew why.
he always hugged rose, with or without reason.

he had to grieve her before he could establish any sort of relation ship with her or any one else.
and strangely, that made her decide. he shouldn't be alone. he'll always be lonely but at least for now, he wouldn't be alone.
she'd go with him.

Doctor Who
Doctor/Rose
post-Doomsday
all-ages


"I held the pieces of my soul
I was shattered and I wanted you to come and make me whole
When I saw you yesterday
But you didn't notice
And you just walked away"

After Norway and Bad Wolf Bay, the Doctor keeps on travelling.
visits a few old worlds, looking for comfort in the familiarity, and a few new and dangerous ones, to distract and entertain himself.
it doesn't work. he thinks of getting a new companion but no one seems good enough.
he almost get himself killed a few times. he's getting reckless.
the pain is fresh and new and he's not sure what to do about it.
so he gives into what he's sure it's the worst idea ever but it's the only thing that makes sense.
he travel to london in 1986 and sees rose and pete tyler coming home with baby!rose.
he's there at her father's funeral.
he fast-forwards to a few more years and sees rose in the park, playing with other kids. she's wearing a skirt and a little top that says 'princess', her blonde hair it's long and completely messy.
she is a beautiful little girl.
a few more years take him to her first day of school.
only 6 and already so stubborn. he smiles at the sight of her fighting the teacher to be at the front of the class.

he sees her grow up. remembers all the stories she told him and witnesses all the ones she never did.
she watches her drop out of school for that scumbag and almost wants to go and convince her to go back. but he doesn't. cause if she had, maybe she wouldn't have ended up with him after all.

he's watching when she dumps the scumbag and when she first kissess mickey. he's there when she takes the job at henrik's.

and he's there watching the day everything changes. the day his ninth self meets her and whisks her along to travel through time and space.

it helps him. somehow, it seems to be what he needed. he feels more like himself. ready to go out again.

he doesn't know if he'll ever meet another human as fantastic as rose but she has made him believe in the human race.

Doctor Who
Rose POV


"I'm a little too young to understand, but it's a little too late to hold my hand"

My life is travelling with the last Time Lord.
it's not normal, it's not safe and it's certainly not what i expected.
i've almost died a few times and almost destroyed the universe a few more.
and he's been with me every step of the way. showing me the universe and doing his best to keep me safe.
i know he feels guilty everytime i'm in danger, wondering how he'll ever face my mother if i don't survive.
that's something i wouldn't want to see.

those who know, they don't get it. why i stay with him. why i can never go home.
at first, it was about seeing the universe out there. learning about aliens and races and having fun adventures.
but getting to know the doctor, i realized i can never leave him.
i don't want to. this feels right. where i belong.
he's so lonely. he saved me from a boring existence and i saved him from going crazy with his solitude.

we are good together.

never in my wildest dreams i imagined this in my future. but i wouldn't change it for the world.

it's my first drwho fic!

Doctor Who
Ten/Rose
Post-Doomsday
all-ages
one shot
characters are not mine.

#31“This is not who i am, this is not what i do
this is not who i am, i think i’m falling for you”



Companions come and go. I’ve always known that.
‘never get too attached’ is my first rule. (because not getting attached at all would be boring)
it’s always been a bit sad when they leave but i get over it. Never done any effort to go back to see them or check up on them. Until Rose.

She was so especial. So different. Just a human, and still capable of so much.
I loved her naivety, her innocence as well as her spunk and attitude. She was unique.

Letting her go without saying goodbye was unbearable.

I miss her quite a lot as it is.

i think i might have actually fallen for a human.
(That should be impossible, but well, i’m big on impossible.)

She wanted to stay with me forever. I knew that was impossible, but i hope we’d have a few years at least.

But then came Torchwood and the war.

Our time together was short but oh so fantastic.

She made her mark. Which is why i had to say goodbye, no matter the cost. It was completely unlike me.
I guess she did change me a bit.

The worst part is not knowing.
She’s the one adventure i’ll never have and that’s what makes it so intriguing. I’ve never been one to wonder about what if’s, but that’s another sign of what she did to me.

I want to know what will happen with her and i want to know what could have happened had we stayed together.